Life, travel

Travel: me vs. him

I woke up at 2 a.m. when Ivan got up to leave for the airport. His flight was at 6 a.m., out of Chicago, which meant a very early departure time from home. YUCK. I am sooo not a fan of super early flights, but I guess on the plus side, they’ll be in Mexico before 11 a.m.

He tried to not wake me up, but of course, I heard him, and I was then awake for over an hour. Ugh.

Can I just say how jealous I am of how easy it seems to be a guy? First of all, he literally packed his stuff in 20 minutes last night. At 7:30 p.m., he hadn’t packed a single thing yet. I went downstairs and jumped on a Zoom meeting from 7:30-8 for some swim team stuff, and when I went upstairs a little after 8, his bag was neatly sitting by the door and he was in bed watching a soccer game.

I was like, Wait, what?! No matter where I go, it seems to take me forever to pack. I can never decide what to take, I seem to go in circles adding “one more thing”…. hmph.

Also, he woke up at 2 a.m. this morning and I think was literally out the door by 2:10 to pick up his brother. I heard him splash some water on his face, brush his teeth, put his clothes on and put a hat on his head. The end.

If I were going, well, first of all, I would have wanted to shower. Because I feel gross if I don’t shower, and I feel like I look gross if I don’t shower. Then, I would definitely need some makeup to look semi-alive at 2 a.m. And then I’d probably need several trips of puttering around the house again to make sure I had everything. I don’t know, but I definitely would need more than 10 minutes. NOT FAIR.

Anyway, just some observations.

He is Excited with a Capital E to be going to Mexico. It’s so cute. He’s been talking about it for weeks now, how he is just SO EXCITED. 🙂

I think it’s great that he loves going home so much. He’s really close with his family, which I think is fantastic, of course. He isn’t going out of just a sense of “obligation” or anything, like, Well, guess I gotta go see the old folks….No. He truly wants to go and seems to enjoy every minute that he’s there.

I’m also glad that he goes home at least once a year by himself. It’s not that we don’t have a great time when we all go- we do! But I really think there’s something to be said for spending time ALONE with your original/ nuclear family. It’s just…. different when the spouse isn’t there. This way, he doesn’t have to be thinking about me or the kids or anything- he can just focus on his parents, his siblings, etc. and really spend some quality time connecting with them.

We are both in agreeance that this an important thing, and I’m more than happy to encourage it, honestly.

Although, this time they are going to the beach in Acapulco for a few days- Ivan, his brother who lives in the U.S., his parents, plus a sister and brother that live in Mexico. So I’m a teeny bit jealous of that…. Acapulco is GORGEOUS. (Ivan planned it for his Dad’s 70th birthday.) We actually did consider all going this time, due to the birthday thing, but ultimately decided against it. First, it’s expensive to fly us all there for just a few days. And also, the kids are already missing over a week of school next month for our spring break trip. So, pulling them for another ~4 days now wouldn’t be great, and we are right at the end of Asher’s swim season, too, which wouldn’t be great timing to miss, anyway. And, we were just all there in August for 2 weeks and will be going again for Christmas 2023.

(Although last night Ivan did pull out his phone and was like, hmm… there’s a 4 p.m. flight out of Chicago…. maybe you guys should just come on that one. And I was like, Honey, just GO!! We’re fine. Have fun!!!! 🙂 )

I’m honestly kind of looking forward to a few days of “alone time”, anyway. I mean, not that I want him gone, but you know what I mean. Just some quieter evenings where I can just sit and read and relax and do my own thing. A little “break” from normal life for me, too.

I’ll just scroll some pics from when we were last in Acapulco and try to feel the warm sun through the photos….

Happy birthday to mi suegro! He’s going to be overjoyed and surprised when his two oldest sons show up later today. 🙂

Daily Gratitude:

I am grateful that the weather pattern of some snow forecasted isn’t moving in until tomorrow, so it’s not impacting Ivan’s travel day.

12 thoughts on “Travel: me vs. him”

  1. This is so true about travel for men vs women, but also more generally in life.
    I’m going in for day surgery today, and I have lunchboxes ready for the kids tomorrow, got groceries yesterday, have laundry going now – in addition to tying up loose ends at work since I’ll be off for a few days. And I thought: my husband wouldn’t be doing this if HE was heading in for day surgery. I just think through things so differently and also know how much stuff I juggle in the background. He’s 100% capable of handling all this stuff solo (and will), but I couldn’t relax and feel ready without getting some ducks in a row at home!


    1. good luck with the surgery Elizabeth. I totally get your point of still remember doing things for the family when we have a big event. it’s just in our DNA.


      1. Thanks ❤
        It went smoothly and aside from some nausea and abdominal pain last night, I feel GREAT! That said, I took today and tomorrow off work and am quite enjoying a few days of doctor-ordered rest!


  2. How exciting that his sons are surprising their dad on this milestone birthday! And I can see how Ivan going on his own once a year is very important. There is quite a cultural difference between his family and a typical Midwest family – I’m thinking specifically of the late nights! I would have a hard time with that. I would try to hang and be fun but it would wear me out. When he goes on his own, he doesn’t have to worry about his tired, introverted wife. 😉

    Phil is basically the same as Ivan. He goes to Austin, TX today for a few days for work. He packed a duffle bag last night. He did not have a packing list in his phone to consult like I did. When we travel as a family, I pack for myself and the boys so it’s a lot more work for me! No matter where we go or for how long, he brings this small duffle bag and then comments on my ridiculously heavy carry-on. I very very very rarely check a bag, though, so I can control my packing but still… I have to bring way more than he does to any location. I don’t need to shower in the morning, but it would take me longer to get out of the house than it took him. Phil could be up and gone in 10 minutes, too! When I travel for work, I usually lay out outfits for the boys so Phil doesn’t have to do that. It’s not a lot of work to pick out the outfits, but I’m a little more particular about how they are dressed. Like Phil would put Will in gray sweatpants with a classing gray and black striped top and that makes me cringe a bit. Ha. But similar to how you are looking forward to some quiet days in the house, I’m looking forward to that, too. I’d rather have him around to help with the kids, especially Will! But I’ll get more reading time in!

    I don’t spend much time on my own with my family but we do try to visit my parents when it’s just us there because it’s a more enjoyable experience for both of us. When more siblings are there, it’s loud and sleeping arrangements are challenging. And I honestly prefer a quieter environment so I’m not sacrificing anything by missing the big gatherings since I’m am introvert and do not love sharing a room with both kids! Phil goes to his mom’s every other week and usually brings Paul. Will and I stay home. When Will is a bit older, the 3 of them will go out there and I will get a glorious break!


    1. Yes, it was really great! His parents and sisters had gathered at his sister’s house, and then Ivan and his brother showed up- the got a video and his dad was so surprised and touched that he cried!! So cute. 🙂


  3. i was nodding as I read this. Same with my husband, always last minute packer, not stressed, although often he forgets something. guys are just easy. for packing, i have a list with all things I need for most of the trips and I will just have it as a check list. over the years, I’ve managed to pack less and less as I often time find things I don’t use so I’d cross it over my list.
    about being alone, i totally get it. I think it’s great that you support Ivan to go to Mexico solo once a year. it makes him happy, it gives you some space. In march, my husband Tony will go to shanghai with my mom for a week, so kind of solo trip too. He always supports me for solo trips (running, work) so I think I should return the favor. I also enjoy single parenting sometimes.


    1. I really need to make a master packing list and keep it in my google drive or something. Making some more standard lists to refer to was actually one of my 2023 goals. Maybe I should do that now when I pack for our next big trip.


  4. You are spot-on with the “nuclear” family.

    But I pack like Ivan. #sorrynotsorry. A laminated wipe-off checklist helps!


  5. It’s so “easy” for guys to get ready, isn’t it? For us gals, we always have to think about “so much” more. I do agree with your take on letting him spend some time alone with his nuclear family. I have taken trips home to Germany alone and while I always want Jon there, it’s also nice to just be in your home environment and solely focus on your parents/siblings.


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