Highs/Lows, the week, etc.

It’s been a whole week since I’ve posted! I have not had much margin and frankly am feeling rather out of sorts, but there’s been a lot of good stuff this week, too.

I am feeling a need to do a brain dump/ vent session though, so… may I?

Things that have me feeling stressed out:

1. People in my house. Oh how I wish I were one of those happy-go-lucky hosts whose cup is just so filled up by having a house full of people. Alas, I am not. Instead, even when things are objectively going great, I still feel… off. My normal routines get all turned upside down for a prolonged period and I do.not.like.it.

For example, my early morning routine normally involves going downstairs (to the basement), making tea at the bar, turning on some lights, turning the local morning news on the bar TV, and then planning my day, journaling, etc. and sometimes doing a home workout.

Well, our guest room is in the basement, so unless I were very rude, and I’m not, I can’t traipse around making noise and turning on TVs and lights at 5:30 a.m. Instead I have to tiptoe around, and although I suppose it’s technically possible, working out down there right now feels too “noisy”, or something.

Later in the morning, when all 4 of us are trying to get ready and out of the house, my normal routine is to shower and use the downstairs bathroom because Ivan is always hogging our (small) master bath at the same time I’d like to be using it. This works very well, normally. Except when guests are down there and I don’t feel right using “their” bathroom. I can’t use the boys’ bathroom either, because with their staggered start times, it seems like one of them is either showering or brushing their teeth or fixing their hair for like, 2 hours.

We have 3 bathrooms, but this whole past week has been a major headache trying to get ready for work and I just want everyone out of my spaces so I can get ready in peace and do what I need to do.

People in my house also means people around at random times during my workday, it means I have to “people” right up until it’s time for bed after already “peopling” all day during my work day, too, it means being extra mindful of keeping our spaces picked up, it means making sure we have food/coffee/ the tea people drink, etc on hand…

This sounds very much like complaining, and I guess it is. But really, my in-laws are GREAT houseguests overall. They’re so easy, my mother-in-law is constantly helping to clean something or cook something, they are tidy, they are quiet, they are self-sufficient and don’t expect me to make their coffee even or anything. It is GOOD that they are here, I am truly happy that they are here. And yet…. it’s still disorienting (and honestly, stressful) for me to have people in my house (for extended periods).

*I find it very different when people are coming for a couple of days and we are able to essentially “clear the decks” and not plan to do ANY of our “normal” life activities besides host the people for a few days. I actually don’t mind that. I struggle much more when it’s a longer period where I’m supposed to somehow sort of “live normally” (i.e. work, exercise, run the kids around, do normal life) but with added people and a bunch of misc. activities in the mix that ultimately prevent me from actually “living normally”…. It just doesn’t really work for me?! I end up feeling like I’m in a weird holding pattern for the whole time. Perhaps this is a me problem, but it is what it is. 🤷‍♀️

(Okay, #1 went down a rabbit hole, sorry… let’s do the rest in more rapid fire style!!)

2. I got sick this past weekend and it’s lingering around. It started Friday/Saturday but I thought it was just my chronic cough thing escalating. Well, by Sunday night it turned into more of a full on bad head cold of sorts. I actually took the day off Monday because I felt so lousy.

3. I haven’t exercised in….at least a week? I have also been eating like garbage and just feel completely out of any “healthy living” routines at the moment.

4. I have had way too many late nights and thus later mornings, and without my normal morning time to get my day organized, I just feel behind the 8 ball all day long.…

5. I overslept 2 times (why was my alarm going off on my watch, silently?!).

6. Work has been bonkers and I am feeling very anxious about things piling up around my upcoming trips and sometimes I just want to cry about it.

7. My back is still bothering me quite a lot. I skipped volleyball last week but played last night. It held up decently during the game, but I could definitely feel it and it was definitely not “right” immediately after, or this morning. Sigh. I just don’t know.

8. My cough has been pretty terrible and getting worse? I have frequent coughing fits that just won’t stop (bad tickle feeling in my throat) and it’s been really bad at night. But now I can’t exactly tell what of this is hanging around from being sick vs. this chronic cough!!! I have a call in to the doctor again. I’m not supposed to see her again until after my Nova Scotia trip but now I’m fretting about getting a coughing fit on the airplane (can I wear a sign that says “it’s not COVID, just possibly allergies or silent GERD? 😅) and/or just disrupting my trip!! It’s been pretty persistent now and it’s wearing on me.

9. There is a certain non-bloggable extended family situation that has me wanting to go jump off the nearest bridge.

10. Juggling my in-laws between us, my SIL and my BIL has been okay overall but also a bit wonky. I’m not in charge here, nor do I want to be, but let’s just say that “plans” have been…. loose. So it’s not always clear day to day WHAT is going on even that same evening, or when we’ll have them with us or not. It can feel a bit chaotic.

11. There has been little-to-no-margin in my days, which makes sense since we have family here, but we’ve been doing a lot of things and this upcoming weekend will also be very full. Asher has a swim meet Saturday morning and I’m volunteering at that, and then we’re all going to a “party” at Ivan’s cousin’s house which I’m sure will be all afternoon until late at night. Sunday I don’t know yet but we might go to Milwaukee? Monday I have a swim board meeting and Tuesday Ethan has a soccer game and at 6:15 a.m. on Wednesday I’ll be on a plane to Nova Scotia!! (I cannot wait and I NEED this trip especially right now!)

---

Highs!!

Okay, whew, I’m sorry- that was a lot. But let’s end the post with a highlight reel, because despite my laundry list of complaints, there have actually been a ton of good things and it’s honestly been a wonderful time (overall).

🔷 My in-laws (and Ivan’s cousin’s family) attended Ethan’s game last week. It was a beautiful night for soccer!!!

🔷 On Friday we took them to our Mexican restaurant, of course!

🔷 We took an evening stroll around the Capitol.

🔷 I drove (alone!) to Brookfield for Ethan’s Saturday morning soccer game. (He rode the bus with the team.) The day was gorgeous and I listened to 90s country the whole way there and thoroughly enjoyed that. My parents met me at the game and then took Ethan and I out for lunch after before Ethan and I headed home. It was a great quick visit with them and also got me that little quiet car time + some bonus 1:1 time with Ethan (which seems HARD to come by lately…).

*Ivan and his parents stayed back- Ivan had his own game and my in-laws had some plans with my SIL during the day.

🔷 Saturday night we had “everyone” over for a big meal (chicken mole that my MIL cooked and was KILLER) and a bonfire. It was really fun! My contribution was getting all the S’mores ingredients, setting up all the chairs, stringing new lights in the trees and I built the actual fire. Also, we went to bed around 1 a.m…..(this was right when I was getting sick but didn’t really realize it, so this probably did me zero favors).

🔷 Charlie is completely unfazed by having houseguests and is not sure what I’m so stressed about all the time.

🔷 My in-laws were gone with my BIL and his gf most of Sunday, so we did actually have a little reprieve. I cannot even think right now what we did all day, but I was sick so it was kind of a blur. We did watch a sort of…interesting… Cowboys vs Packers game Sunday night on the couch.

🔷 The weather continues to think it is Summer which I have mixed feelings on but the days have been beautiful. I took my laptop outside for an hour on Tuesday to attend a virtual Grand Rounds presentation with Charlie. It was quite lovely.

🔷 I played volleyball last night at 6:50 while Ivan and his brother took his parents out for dinner. Afterwards, I hung out for a bit in the gym bar (I stuck to water though as I still just don’t feel 100%) with my friends. On my way home, Ivan called to see if I wanted to go to his BIL’s with his parents for “coffee”. It was 8:37 p.m. Um… sure. So I went over there (it’s close) and chatted with them and drank some manzanilla tea until 10 p.m.

🔷 Charlie likes my father-in-law! (Not a difficult feat… Charlie likes pretty much everyone who scratches him.)

🔷 I got out for a quick morning walk yesterday and it was such a pretty morning.

So there are my updates from the past week. I do apologize for the first half, if that sounds super negative and whiny and like I’m just one big complainer. But the truth is I HAVE felt a lot of mixed things this past week, so, hopefully this post at least honestly portrays that. Overall though, I think the visit is going very well. It definitely does help that Ivan’s siblings are around to help share the load somewhat!

Daily Gratitude:

I am grateful for having a good relationship with my in-laws. I know this is not the case for everyone, so I do feel really lucky that we get along very well.