Deep thoughts

Opinion overload

Happy Saturday morning! We are in for another bigger winter storm starting tonight through most of day tomorrow, so we are planning to hunker down later and probably not come out until tomorrow night sometime (if at all). I’ve heard the weather forecasters all warning that “travel on the roads is not recommended”, so we’ll happily heed that and snuggle in with a movie. 🙂

Something that’s on my mind…. (warning, kind of “negative”….)

This week I have been feeling very overwhelmed and exhausted by something I am calling “opinion overload”. Everywhere I look, everyday, I am being inundated by other people’s opinions about things. This isn’t necessarily “bad” in and of itself, but it just hit me this week like a brick. I’m tired of it.

It’s not that I don’t value other people’s opinions. OF COURSE I do!! Listening to others is a wonderful way to think about ideas in a different light, to grow, etc.

But it feels like too much lately. I don’t want to know what every single person in town thinks about the new coffee shop. I don’t want to know that a boy I knew in grade school hated that new movie out on Disney+. I don’t need Facebook to inform me that “so-and-so” “likes” Adidas. This is of course not even touching the subjects of politics, the coronavirus, school issues, and the whole slew of other highly polarized topics out there.

This started gnawing at me specifically last Monday, when after I finished my book club book I decided to browse a few reviews of it on Goodreads. (Why? I do not know. I feel like Goodreads reviewers are exceptionally ruthless.)

Anyway, I LOVED the book I read. But yet, when I jumped online, I started reading dozens of really quite negative reviews- about the book that I just loved. Obviously, those people are 100% entitled to their opinion about the book! But it just kind of felt like a big downer for some reason. Of course, some other reviewers sang accolades about the book as well. It made me scratch my head. How can SO MANY PEOPLE read the exact same book, and walk away with such drastically different opinions of it?? I feel like this explains a lot about the world today.

I was talking about it with my mom the other day, too. We were saying how back when I was a kid, no one knew all of this random stuff about other people (unless you were close to them)! You didn’t see what politically slanted article someone read in their free time, or have to see their comments on it, or even have any idea how they voted. Now I feel like I constantly get all these odd little snippets of other people’s lives- probably not enough to put together a fair, whole and accurate picture, either, though. It feels strange, and kind of dangerous, in a way. And exhausting.

I guess I’m just tired of all the NOISE. (I also fully recognize that using social media is a choice. I have been limiting my consumption by a lot, which does help. But when I do peek in on it (still more than I should be, probably), the opinion overload starts again….)

Again, to be clear, I fully believe that everyone is entitled to their opinion. I’m not questioning that. But I just miss the days when 5,982 opinions weren’t being shoved in my face 24/7. I guess I’d rather hear opinions when I seek them out, from actual friends or family that I value or want to have a true, meaningful discussion with.

I was talking with Ivan and said, “OMG. I just want to live my life without all of the constant chatter! If I like a book, I just want to enjoy that, without reading a million reasons that I’m stupid for liking this book. Or whatever.”

He shrugged it off and said, “STOP LOOKING AT IT!!! WHO CARES what someone else thinks???” (He barely uses social media and his personality is one that generally doesn’t give two $h!ts what someone else thinks about him or his choices. I love that very much about him….it’s always been much harder for me.)

Anyway, sorry to start the weekend with a negative tone. Also, this was kinda long. 🙂 But it feels good to get that off my chest. 🙂

Now, since this is a place where I do value hearing others’ opinions ;), what do you think? Am I alone in this feeling??

Daily Gratitude:

I am grateful for a solo outing with Ethan last night! I feel like I barely get 1:1 time with him lately, so we went out for pizza just the two of us (at a mostly empty Rocky Rococo’s). He even said, “We should do this more often!” YES we should. ❤

7 thoughts on “Opinion overload”

  1. Haha I gotta agree with Ivan on this one… STOP LOOKING AT IT! WHO CARES!!??

    Keep this quote in mind…. “Opinions are like buttholes. Everyone has one, and none of them smell very good.”

    You are running around trying to smell other people’s buttholes, and then getting annoyed that they don’t smell good. (sorry for the gross analogy). Anyway, stop sniffing around. Just hang out with the people you know and like already. For the friends on FB that don’t add any true value to your feed (Dis+ kid story), mute them for a while.

    My 2 cents.

    Have an awesome weekend, Kae and family.

    PS. I’m grateful for my Uggs this morning. Helping me beat the cold mornings 🙂


    1. Bahahaha!!!! Thanks for cracking me up! 😂I’d never heard that quote before. It is a gross analogy, but that definitely gets the point across! I clearly needed that reminder. You are 100% right! I should probably do a big purge/mute on social media too (or, just stop looking at it!!). 🙂 Have a great weekend! I didn’t know you got cold mornings in LA. 😉


  2. Ha I like Joel’s comment and I heard that quote before! I feel the same as you do which is why I have gone off social media and contemplated quitting it entirely. I went off in November because even seeing political opinions I agreed with stressed me out! I will go off for lent and am wondering if I should come back on. I can mute and unfollow people but it doesn’t solve the problem of social media being the source of so much judgment and worst of all, the spread of disinformation! So I feel like I should boycott it? I miss the days where you only found out people’s opinions by discussion.


  3. Probably 10 years ago I read Amy Pohlers Yes Please and she uses the phrase, “Good for you, not for me.” I recently also heard “Don’t yuck someone else’s yum.” And so I don’t care. You mentioned you’re an empath though so I get it!


  4. I think there might be some other reason that triggered you, probably related to the different reviews to a book that you loved, as if you were not right about it, then it made the rest of opinions more pronounced than usual, as you are sensitive to different opinions when you normally ignore them.
    it happens to all of us, then we are triggered by something is like a light turned on in a place that was dark before and now it’s in front of us and we can’t ignore it.
    it shall pass.
    I am also someone that don’t care 99% of opinions, except from few people that I care the most. think about whose opinion you care, it should be less than 5, and then ignore the rest. 🙂


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