travel

We’re home! Mexico trip brain dump

Grateful Kae

Sorry guys! Totally fell off the blogging wagon this trip!

But that’s okay. I ended up sort of not really having time, but mostly I sort of just wasn’t feeling it (blogging, not the trip!). So I didn’t.

We got home yesterday afternoon. (All smooth except one of the LONGEST lines for immigration at O’Hare ever…..we landed at 1:40 p.m. and didn’t get out until 3:15….😫).

Trip Summary: It was wonderful!!! 💗

I want to catch up on more official posts (for whoever’s interested, but mostly for myself!), but for now will just share some general thoughts.

🔷 It was the right call to go for the whole week. Definitely!!! I have zero regrets. School can be made up. These experiences??? PRICELESS.

🔷Having the boys’ cousin along (from the U.S.) made the trip so special. They had an absolute blast together and I know they will never, ever forget this trip.

🔷The Mexican culture is sooooo vibrant.

It’s such a tough thing for me to wrap my head around sometimes. On the one hand, there are things that are not always perfect about Mexico, at all.

Our Mexico trips can include, as his mom herself said, “inconveniences”. (e.g. Inconsistent hot shower water. Too many people in one house (or, car…), sometimes. Not always the most private bathroom situations. Bad traffic. Dog poop in the street…Loud (but, festive?) music may play at all hours of the night, from somewhere in the neighborhood. Car horns. Noise. Dogs barking. The guy selling tamales that rides through the neighborhood yelling “tamales….tamales….” over the loudspeaker. The garbage truck loudly ringing a bell so people can run their trash out. Weird smells. Potholes. Church bells. Conditions some places we go are, let’s just say, not the same as we are used to (and blessed to have). Etc.)

Yes, Mexico can be a little (or a lot) rough around the edges. But what it lacks in, I guess, first-world standards, it makes up for with honestly the most beautiful culture.

There is so much less emphasis on all the little lesser-important details of life, and much more focus on people. And just living.

On Saturday after the quinceanera Friday night, a bunch of people were over, and everyone was talking at the same time and hooting and hollering and laughing so hard that tears were streaming down some people’s faces, and it was so loud, and chaotic, and it also struck me as so beautiful at the same time. (I wanted to secretly take a video to capture the moment, but didn’t.) No one cared one bit that the house was a mess since we had gotten in from the quinceanera at 3 a.m. and presents were strewn around and breakfast dishes were still in the sink. It was just this big FAMILY.

The quinceanera itself was just stunning. The traditions were so rich and gorgeous.

The food in Mexico is absolutely the best. Full stop.

There is such a culture of connection, and togetherness.

There’s also a focus on manners/ politeness that I definitely do not see here in the U.S. Example: whenever you arrive at someone’s house, everyone- not joking, everyone, down to the smallest child, goes around and individually greets everyone with an “air kiss” to the cheek and handshake, one by one. (You know, how they kiss in France, on both cheeks? But in Mexico it’s only one cheek. Also, I think this may be regional.) It’s considered rude to do what comes naturally to me, which would be to walk in, throw a wave to the whole room and be like, “Hi everyone!”. Nope. When in Rome…. I’ve been around long enough to know the drill. You make the rounds. Hola, como estan?…(kiss). Hola…. (kiss). Hola… (kiss). Then when you leave, you repeat the process to say goodbye.

You WILL be offered food, and drink, and offered a chair. Young kids know all the same social norms and do them all without being told, or complaining.

Mexican music is captivating and even if you don’t know how to dance, it’s impossible to not at least wish you could, or get into the beat.

🔷 That said, it’s complicated. Because while the culture is just really quite incredible, I’m always happy to get home, too.

In part due to some of the “inconveniences” (see above), mostly. Things in the U.S. just feel so much more…. organized. Haha. And I maintain that it should be a national requirement for American kids to go to spend some time in more second/third world countries for a while, to better appreciate what they have at home everyday that they take for granted.

🔷 I absolutely adore seeing Ivan in his “home environment”. He’s always soooo happy in Mexico. (Even though, he agrees, it’s complicated! He no longer has any desire to live in Mexico (or at least not in the bigger city areas), and now, after being away for so long, he sees all the same issues there.) But he LOVES LOVES LOVES being “home”. He soaks up every single minute he can with his family, the food, just being there, everything. There is never, ever a sense of “obligation” to go back to visit- he truly wants to be there. And he didn’t want to leave, at all. (It made me sad!)

Seeing him at “home” is one of the best things for our marriage, I think. It makes me really understand him better. It makes me understand his roots, his culture, who he IS, why he may do what he does, or think what he thinks at times.

🔷I feel so grateful that our kids are getting this bi-cultural experience. My family is really different from his family (also amazing- just in very different ways!). I’m so glad the kids have had this opportunity to be truly immersed in both cultures. It’s super cool. Also, I am SO grateful that I learned Spanish like I did!!! omg. Haha. I can’t imagine what our trips would be like for me without that.

That’s all for now! I will follow up this week with a couple other posts to recap some of the other things we did. And, of course, a full quinceanera recap!! (Spoiler- I gave a SPEECH! For the first time ever! And in Spanish!)

Since I know you can’t wait to see how my dress turned out (lol!), here are a couple of sneak peeks:

I mean….. !!!! Can I say, WOW!!?!?!

Daily Gratitude:

I am grateful for an amazing trip! And also, for my home sweet home…. 🙂

18 thoughts on “We’re home! Mexico trip brain dump”

  1. I’m glad you didn’t post regularly- but rather just enjoyed your time in Mexico. I laughed while I read the paragraph about “inconveniences”; hmm sounds a lot like Progreso! We will be arriving there Dec 31 this year and I’m already resigned to the fact that there will be music and noise all night long for New Year’s Eve. And yes the dog poop, barking dogs and more. But it’s such a fun place. I’ve have seen a few quinciniera pics being taken on the Malecon, and the dresses! Oh my they are gorgeous! And your dress is beautiful as well.

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    1. Oh, I can imagine taking quinceanera photos along the ocean there must be just beautiful!! How exciting to be there for New Years. I hope you have an amazing time!! You’ll have to tell me all about it. 🙂

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  2. I love this so much!!! I love your dress and, wow- the quinceanera girl looks beautiful!

    I want to send my daughter to Mexico for a week. She complains so much about all the things that are “wrong” with our country. A trip to Mexico would be good for her. On the other side of things, I love all the positive things you listed. It reminds me of a conversation I overheard at work one day- two of my coworkers are Columbian (yes, I know Mexico and Columbia are two different countries- bear with me…) One said that her (American) husband liked to smoke pot, and they rolled their eyes and agreed that it was “very American.” I asked why, and they said “When Americans get depressed, they smoke pot. In Columbia if we get depressed, we go out and dance.”

    I’m looking forward to more details!

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    1. Reminds me of a video of a French guy who goes in French accent…”In America you ave terapie, in France, we ave boulangerie” and take a bit of a croissant lol

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    2. Haha, that’s so funny about your workers’ conversation. Sounds about right!

      And just let me know… I can happily drag your daughter along next time! 😉 lol!!! She might change her tune fast. 😂😂

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  3. Many blessings to the Quinceañera for a long, healthy, and wonderful, life! She looks stunning!!

    Happy to hear you had a wonderful trip. I feel in a similar way about Russia. I have no desire to move back like-EVER- but I miss the culture of togetherness and just being in the moment.

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  4. Hooray! Glad it was a great trip, and such great reflections and insights about differences in Mexican life and culture. You looked so beautiful in the dress Kae! As did the the quinceanera girl! How special your boys get to experience both cultures.

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    1. Thanks Sophie! And thanks for the kind words. I was really happy with how my dress/ outfit worked out and in general how we ended up coordinating (both me and Ivan) with her color scheme/ dress! Haha. Small detail, but just made it that much nicer. 🙂

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  5. That’s exactly the reason I want to move to Latin America next Kae, the warmness of people, how they value/prioritize relationships, communities, over economic growth and conveniences. when I first moved to Asia, I also got annoyed by the inconveniences of a developing country, but the rest over compensated. Oh… another thing is if you have means, those inconveniences can go away pretty easily.

    I also feel that my husband is at his essence when we go back to Shanghai, he’s so comfoorablee with his extended family, his friends, his surroundings. I love him more knowing that he “sacrifices” to me with me out of his preferred setting.

    And yes, exposure for the kids to that part of their culture origin is great, another reason I want to move to LAC. hahaha…. to let them know where I came from.

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    1. Yes, certainly many of the big inconveniences could go away with enough $$…but unfortunately most of the people there wouldn’t ever have those means… so that makes it very hard. Also, much of the infrastructure, etc is still just not great, so even a rich person still has to deal with the crappy roads, infrastructure, general issues outdoors like the dogs in the streets or safety concerns, etc. But I know what you mean! And yes, the culture is so special and beautiful!!!

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  6. That party looks amazing! I am curious how much a party like that costs in Mexico! It looks like a wedding! You look gorgeous in your dress and Ivan looks so handsome. I am glad you all enjoyed a week of being immersed in a different culture. I am sure it is loud and overstimulating at times for a gringo midwesterner like us but I bet it is so great to see Ivan living his best life with family. I had a similar feeling about the culture in the DR when I visited my friend in the peace corp. Hospitality is such a big deal. And I was visiting an area that was extremely poor but yet they were so happy? That is over simplifying things of course. They had major challenges – hence the reason my friend was there with the PC.

    It’s nice that Kalej could come with too so the boys had a cousin they know super well there. Do they mesh well with their Mexico-based cousins? I feel like even though my nieces and nephews all came from the same cultures because they are kind of spread out that they aren’t super close and things can feel a bit stilted when they see each other now that they are teens. I grew up so close (geographically) to most of my cousins so my cousins were my best friends when I was growing up. My kids won’t have that dynamic although I am going to try hard to make sure they are close to my sister’s kids. That will require plane travel but it’s worth it.

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    1. They have one Mexico based boy cousin who is Asher’s age and they get along really well with him. But he lives in Mexico City so we usually only see them a couple times during the trip. They were all at the party though so the 4 boys all hung out together during that time and then the next day at my in-laws’ house too. Some of the other younger or older cousins they don’t really know very well. Also, there are just SO many people. Both sides of Ivan’s family are huge, so even I often get mixed up with who is who. They all know me, of course, because I kind of stand out! haha. But sometimes I’m like, ahhh…. I’m not 100% sure of who exactly this person is or their name!! Even some of the people we see a lot, I can sometimes mix up their kids, etc… lol.

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  7. Beautiful family! It sounds like a great trip. I appreciate how you share about Ivan in his home environment. You provide such a rich description.

    My spouse is from another country and visiting always makes me understand him more (18 years later). Trips also provide a new perspective to value the life we’ve built together that is very different than how we were raised.

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    1. Thanks Amanda! Yes, it really is important, isn’t it. It makes a big difference! It also makes me appreciate being the “fish out of water” for a change. I think over the years I have taken for granted how he just has had to adapt to the culture, language, traditions, etc here in the U.S. And even though I speak Spanish, it’s still really different to be dealing in another currency, another language, a different measurement system! haha, different customs, etc. It’s not easy! And me living that makes me appreciate the strain that he’s probably had to adapt to over the years. I mean he’s been here a long time now, so I don’t think it’s as big of a deal anymore, but it’s still pretty eye opening for me to experience that.

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  8. What an amazing post and trip! I really don’t know much about mexico (which is crazy, because my aunt is from mexico and I am from california, so obviously I know *about* mexico but have never been there or experienced life there) so I really appreciate this post and your views. It’s always an interesting experience raising multicultural children, wherever you are. And it’s so special watching your children fit in across two cultures. I haven’t had a lot of that yet but I do think it will be an interesting experience to share more of my American life with the kids when we eventually go back to the states.

    I love that you comment on the warmness of people in mexico and the focus on community. One of the things I feel somewhat lacks in the UK is that focus, of course I have great friends here but it can be a little isolated. When Andy and I lived in the states he said he loved social occasions there because people worked hard to make things nice – to have nice conversation – to offer people drinks – and to ask questions. He said that “hosting” in america was really pleasant and different than his experience being hosted here in the UK.

    Thanks for the gorgeous photos and the rundown! I love following your adventures from afar 🙂

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