So a couple other pieces of information have come to light that may also impact the Mexico travel decision (in case you missed it yesterday, spelled out ad nauseum here).
Actually, first of all- THANK YOU to everyone who chimed in! So many thoughtful points!! (Special thanks to my lurkers who came out of lurkerville to post a comment!! 🎉🎉😉)
We have not yet made a final decision, though may be starting to narrow down the options.
The new information:
1- I went to Ethan’s Back to School night with him last night and got to meet and chat with each of his teachers. (It was so fun to have him lead me around the school through his schedule! I loved the vibe and the classrooms and his teachers all seem awesome.)
I explained to each one that we may need to pull him from school for 3 days in October for an important family event in Mexico and how big of a deal did they think it would be in their class?
Basically every single teacher said, Nah, it will be totally fine… go ahead and go!!! His AP World History actually said, “If I were you I’d definitely go! You can’t get those memories back! Sounds like fun!” His Spanish 3 teacher thought a week of being immersed in Spanish sounded amazing.
I was a little surprised, but they also reminded me that Wednesdays and Thursdays are block schedule days there. On those days he has four ~1.5 hour classes instead of all 8 classes, so technically missing Wednesday to Friday = only be missing two days of each class, not three. (I mean… semantics. I realize it’s the same number of class hours, but still. It feels slightly better.)
One perk at his school is that they have daily STAT (student/teacher time) built into their schedule after lunch for 30 minutes. The kids can use that time to sign up to meet with teachers for help, take a quiz they missed, go in for extra review, etc. during the school day. They all said between doing some work before/after/during the trip plus using some STAT times if needed to check in/make anything up, it should be no problem.
So, I feel better overall about that part.
2- Thanks to a local friend who reads this blog, I was informed that, oops, Saturday the 12th is Asher’s freshman year Homecoming dance!!
THANK GOODNESS she pointed this out (#lifesaver!), because that was somehow not even on my radar. Guess I have not added all the school dates to my calendar yet…
I definitely don’t want him to miss Homecoming! (Not sure he has “plans” yet for it, but I asked him and he assumes he will probably want to go w/ friends!).
3- I did a little digging online and found that Ethan can take an in-person practice ACT test this spring at our library, offered through a test prep place, for free. Granted, it would not be this “ACT 10” (the special 10th grade version), it would be a real practice ACT, but whatever. At least he’d get some practice in a more real life setting (i.e. not just at home doing an online version).
I feel like I’d still prefer he could take the pre-ACT 10 at his school. But to answer someone’s question from comments, no, there’s nothing important riding on this pre-ACT, technically. No scholarships or anything. Also, I emailed the Student Services people at school about the test and their response was: “Please do not worry that he is missing out on anything important or vital. The reason we offer this is simply to familiarize them with the standardized testing process. Enjoy the family event!” So they didn’t seem too stressed about it either.
ALSO, I checked and Asher’s public school doesn’t even offer their students this pre-ACT 10 thing, and somehow the kids there seem to survive and get into college. lol. So, while nice and likely beneficial, the pre-ACT is probably not an absolute necessity, either. (Especially if planning additional prep later.)
So! Our new front runner choices are:
a) We all go on Sunday (not Saturday- now needs to be post- Homecoming!). Or, if Ivan really wants to go earlier, he can go Friday after work or Saturday and we’ll go Sunday.
b) Ivan goes on Saturday, and the rest of us go on Wednesday. I don’t think we want to deal with Ethan flying alone, and I think it’d just be easiest/nicest to keep the boys + cousin all together. (They’ll have fun in transit!)
I feel like I’m starting to lean more towards us all just going on Sunday.
The boys would still have to miss some games (the new Sunday option would actually mean Ethan would only miss 2 soccer games though instead of 3- oh, and I also found out 1 of his games is a less important non-conference game).
But I do not believe either boy is planning to pursue college level (and certainly not professional level) soccer or volleyball. So in 10 years, will it matter that they missed a few games? Nope. Neither boy “wants” to miss their games, but they seem okay with it, too.
I also do not truly believe that they’ll even remember if they missed school or not 10 years from now. Asher seems to care less about missing a week of school, and Ethan seemed very comforted by the teachers being relaxed about it.
I do think that in 10 years they may look back fondly and remember “that time we went to Mexico with our cousin” and “went to that big party”. Also, the reality is that we rarely see most of the Mexico family. My mother-in-law comes here for extended periods sometimes (she’s here now!), but my now 70-something father-in-law still works and does not come along. The boys generally only see their grandpa once every 1-2 years! So, that’s something to think about, you know? Sniff… I might have just made up my mind. 🥺
The nice thing about going Sunday would be having Sunday-Thursday to just visit and let the boys enjoy being in Mexico with their cousin/see grandparents in a relaxed fashion before all the hectic party stuff starts on Friday. I assume Saturday will probably be a bit of a post-party hazy day with extended family, etc.
My sister also reminded me of how I actually rearranged a big college Spanish EXAM and missed several days of college classes in order to jet out early to see her over Thanksgiving one year in Ireland while she studied abroad (+ spend a weekend with her in Paris!). And I don’t know what I missed in those couple days of Spanish class, but pretty sure it doesn’t matter anymore- however, I’ll never forget posing in front of the Arc de Triomphe with my sister!
So, TBD… but currently leaning to going Sunday- Sunday! Whew. Why is everything so complicated?! And why do I have to so immensely overthink everything?!
Daily Gratitude:
I am grateful for the opportunity to meet all of Ethan’s teachers last night! I was a little crabby about having to drive all the way over there last night but was so happy I went.
GRATEFUL KAE 
My dad always used to say “Don’t let your schooling get in the way of your education,” before checking me out of school to go skiing, or to visit family, or a big hike. It was a good message for a grade obsessed girl that there were important things to learn outside of the walls of a classroom. I think that definitely applies here.
LikeLike
I love this quote from your dad and it’s so important to remember that educations comes from sooo many other places besides school, including from us parents! Just time with family is a huge education into who you are and where you came from. You can’t get that in school.
LikeLike
I love that!! What a great quote! While yes, regular school is obviously important, it’s so true that some of the most important things we learn in life are from other experiences outside of school! Thanks for sharing this. 🙂
LikeLike
Oh yay! This is all great additional info! Especially the go ahead from his teachers. The Sunday-to-Sunday plan sounds awesome. I hope you have a blast!
LikeLike
Yes, I think we’re just going to go with that decision and stop thinking about it now! Haha! (I sometimes have to literally tell myself, ok, not allowed to consider that anymore, or else I might start going around and around again… ha)
LikeLiked by 1 person
sounds like you’ve reached a decision and I’m glad to hear the teachers were encouraging! Sounds like going Sunday to Sunday will allow a great visit plus the big party time. Sometimes we just need more information to finalize a decision.
LikeLike
Yes! I am glad I took the time to gather some more info here.
Ivan can sometimes be a bit…. how shall we say….” “quicker” about decisions than I am. And I don’t necessarily mean that in a good way- like sometimes he tends to just sort of think it over really briefly and then be like, ok, let’s just do X. And I’m like, “well wait, what about this, and that, and this other thing… You haven’t even thought about half of the issues yet!” I am much more likely to zoom out and consider all angles than he is. So while I can lean too far to the “agonizing over decisions” side, I think he can be too far in the other direction. lol. I guess maybe we sort of balance each other out.
LikeLike
I completely relate. This EXACTLY describes my husband and me and our decision-making dynamic!
LikeLike
I have a hs junior & college freshman – both athletes. So many factors to consider! So much depends on the individual kid, teachers, overall courseload, specific material missed, etc.
Before this post, I was voting for Ivan going Saturday and you traveling with both boys on Wednesday. That allows all to enjoy family time and experience the party. Missing the practice ACT wouldn’t stress me – not hugely important and there are other opportunities. Also wouldn’t worry too much about a few games. From my perspective, the main thing is missing 3-5 days of school, which can be a lot, though being early in the quarter should make this easier.
Given new info, Sunday to Sunday for all sounds good too. I think the priority is making sure the boys have clear plans for how and when they will make up assignments/ labs/quizzes/ tests, etc. If they can do anything in advance, even better. The biggest risk is struggling to catch up, which can snowball if not managed. But it sounds as if both are good students, you are already on top of it, and the teachers are supportive.
My oldest hated missing any time in high school, but she still missed days junior and senior year due to college visits, covid, and rowing championships. And it worked out fine, even with her bonkers number of AP classes. She (and teammates) even missed some AP exams but made them up. There’s almost always a way to make these things work, and your family trip to Mexico sounds like it will be worth the effort and any inconvenience!
If it makes you feel better, our hs junior is missing 2.5 days next week so she can help move her sister into UW. Our hs has block scheduling, so most classes will only be missed once. Her only sibling leaving home for college halfway across the country felt like an important family milestone, and we wanted her to get to see Madison and have the whole family together. We involved her in the decision and all think it will be worth it 🙂
LikeLike
Oh, I hope you guys have the BEST time during move in!!! I immediately checked the weather for next week and it looks like Madison should hopefully be showing off with some great summer weather so you can see our pretty city looking its best!! 😉 Are you guys staying right downtown? So exciting! Email me and let me know how she likes it and how everything goes!!
LikeLike
I’m moving my freshman daughter into Madison on Wednesday too! We live in the Milwaukee suburbs though so a shorter drive and we’re not taking her siblings. Kae, you might hear my tears though as we drive past your area on the way home!
LikeLike
It sounds like Sunday-Sunday might be the best option! At first I thought, miss as little school as possible, but you and all the commenters here have convinced me that the experience is more important than those days of school.
LikeLike
I was really leaning towards Wednesday- Sunday at first, too…. but then as I thought more, I changed my mind (for the most part- don’t make me start thinking about it too much more or I might start second guessing myself!! haha)
LikeLike
Great to have reassurance and encouragement from his teachers, and of course Spanish immersion for a week is good for one subject! I’m sure if he brought some study to Mexico and did say 2-3 study sessions over the week (focusing on his hardest subjects) it would go a long way. So Sunday-Sunday sounds like the best option. Excited for you all to have a great trip 🙂
LikeLike
Yeah, hopefully they can get some of the materials in advance! I’d rather they work ahead some vs trying to just make everything up after. My main concern was that they’d introduce new topics and they’d miss the lectures/lessons and then end up getting behind or confused or something. But I’m sure they can always go meet with their teachers, too.
LikeLike
First time commentor, hi!!!!
I’m an elementary school teacher and have elementary aged kids. My thinking around missing school for the occasional family thing is that kids’ parents are their first and longest teachers so they get to schedule field trips, too.
Reading yesterday’s post, though, I thought, man I guess it is different in high school. But it sounds like your kid’s teachers have the same beliefs as me. Thanks for taking us along for this decision. It’s giving me practice thinking through these kinds of choices long before I’ll have to make them myself!
LikeLike
I always really like following people who are a bit ahead of me in the “parenting game” too, because it’s nice to see other people go through stuff before I have to! haha. At the boys’ elementary/ middle school, they were always really cool about the boys missing school for trips. But I have always figured that high school would be a lot harder, so we always assumed that we would definitely stop pulling the boys for travel in high school. Obviously I’m still trying to avoid it, but this is a special case, so I think it will be ok!! Hopefully!
LikeLike
Oh boy, so much to think about… it seems like you put a lot of thought into it but in the grand scheme of things, these few days are not a big deal and I think you should go on Sunday. You know, in case that sways your opinion, be thankful that you have the option to do this at all… in Germany it’s not really possible (unless in very special cases and with permission) to take kids out of school “just for fun”. It would involve a huge effort up the chain to get “permission” so the fact that it’s really up to you and the boys to decide this, is a plus IMHO.
LikeLike