1st Day is in the books:
It was a pretty uneventful day. They seemed to have mixed feelings. Ethan seemed a bit more distraught at the idea of all the “free time with his friends” ending.
They don’t have to wake up until around 7:00-7:10, which is not too far off from when they often wake up naturally. (Sometimes it was in the 8:00 range for Asher during the summer, but 7:30-8 is pretty normal for Ethan).
Despite some mild grumbling, they were ready on time. The bus comes around 7:42 a.m., so we planned that we’ll leave around 7:38 a.m. to allow extra time (it’s like a 2 minute drive). I usually drive them to the bus stop in the morning because it’s ~3/4 mile at least from our house, which takes quite a while to walk (in the morning, anyway).
We took some cute pictures with the hamsters outside, too. Haha.
Breakfast-Making/ Morning Routine Poll:
So, here’s a quick poll for anyone willing to answer.
Background:
Obviously, in middle school now, the boys are pretty self-sufficient in the mornings, though I often/usually make their breakfasts yet. Ivan sometimes says he feels this is “babying” them and that I should be able to be totally hands off and just let them get themselves completely ready, including making their own breakfast.
(Sometimes I do gripe about the fact that I’m still sort of “needing” (in quotes because I probably don’t really need to) to monitor them and be around during their whole getting ready period, which essentially eats up my morning from ~7-7:45 at least….).
I could be exercising, or working, or whatever, during that time, but I don’t, because I guess a) I feel like they are still just sort of slow and disorganized on their own yet sometimes b) I don’t trust them to bother to make anything more nutritious than just pouring cereal in a bowl and calling it good (whereas I’ll often scramble them eggs, make sure to include fruit, etc.) and c) I do like to see them/ chit chat in the morning, anyway (usually ;))! And d) for some reason I feel guilty if I’m not always with them during that time.
But, then again, sometimes it does feel like a lot of my time eaten up, especially if I have a busy day and have other things I’d like to squeeze in around work (like, a workout or shower!).
So, my question is: What do you think? Do you think it’s still normal to make breakfast and maybe “hand hold” the morning routine a little bit for a 6th and 7th grader??? Or should I be re-claiming/ re-purposing that time and pushing them to just be totally independent in the morning?
*(Disclaimer- If I had to be out the door to an office, I’m sure this wouldn’t even really be a question, because I’d probably be blow drying my hair or getting dressed at that time and they’d have no choice but to run their own mornings. But because I WFH and don’t technically have very strict time boundaries in my job, it is a legit question, for me, anyway.)
Thanks for your input! 🙂
Daily Gratitude:
I am grateful that the kids each get Chromebooks from school this year! How nice. I’m glad they have actual computers now, instead of the iPads they used previously (so they’ll be typing on a normal keyboard now instead of the touch screen).
GRATEFUL KAE 
What fun! So glad they get Chromebooks. I’m also laughing at their outfits. I wish I’d been smart enough to pick out comfortable clothes that I liked for the first day of school; I grew up in the era of a “special” outfit, which was usually a heavier fall outfit that was not at all appropriate for early-September temps!
RE: Breakfast. You know I don’t have kids, but I don’t remember my parents making me breakfast when I was in middle school. But there were limited options. Maybe you could find a middle ground? Set up a breakfast bar with hard boiled eggs, fruit, cereal/milk, whatever? Can you batch cook – or teach them to! – pancakes / waffles to heat up during the week? I often ate peanut butter toast, or yogurt + toast + maybe fruit at that age.
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I think this might be a “boy” thing…. Haha. All the boys seem VERY into athletic wear, alllll the time.
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It’s kind of help yourself, and I’ll do a big breakfast once a week.
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That sounds like a nice balance. 🙂
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My kids are 7 and 9 and they basically fend for themselves for breakfast while my husband I make their snacks and lunch to take to school (no cafeteria in schools here). So this means they normally eat cereal, which I also don’t love but they do get fruit and whole grains for lunch so I’m ok with it. But I think if you like spending that time with them during breakfast, then you should! Bec YOLO and they grow up so fast, etc etc. 🙂
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Yes, I have been thinking just that. I think I really do want to be present during that time, because they are growing up so fast! It is nice to connect before school too. Maybe I’ll just work on us sort of getting breakfast done “together”- which is honestly how it kind of is anyway. (I scramble an egg, they pop toast in and pour milk, etc.)
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what a hard decision and I totally get it. I would ask them to do themselves after they get used to the new routine because it gives them the chance to be independent and responsible. you can still chat with them when they are eating or “monitor” near by at first. I know it’s not easy… but that’s parenting. choose what’s best for them vs what we want as mom (baby them forever!)/
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I have been trying to think through our mornings and how to ensure I’m using that chunk of time how I want to as well. Get stuff done? Work? Spend time with kids? I have 4, 7, & 10 year old so a bit different but our nanny comes at 8:30am, bus at 9am for big kids and kids wake around 7/7:30am so they need to be getting ready/eat something prior to 8:30am. Do you have some things you can do to prep for your day but can be interrupted or squeezed in? Easy work you could do or a list of admin/family mgmt tasks you keep for that time (i.e. Laura V’s batch the small stuff) while also back and forth ensuring they are ready? As for breakfast, I’m OK with most things that fill them up for a bit so not at all strict and honestly prefer something they can do on their own (eggo waffles, cereal) vs. me or my husband making it (eggs).
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Yes, that is a good idea. This week I tried to be intentional about using some of that time to unload the dishwasher or straighten up the house, glance at mail, etc so while they eat I am still there/chatting, but still making sure to use that time for something useful too. It’s not really that much time at our house- maybe really only 7:10/7:15- 7:35… so I think it’s probably worth being around for them, since I can be 🙂
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We have the same conversation in my house. I do have to be at the office at 8 (or around 8) and I still make breakfast and supervise mornings for my 9th, 7th, 6th, and 4th grade boys. My husband thinks they should be able to do it themselves-and they do occasionally. I think it goes better when I am there and they definitely get a healthier more filling breakfast. Plus, I think it is nice to kinda start the day together, although it isn’t always quality time.
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Your blog posts fell off my feedly! I was thinking it was odd that I hadn’t seen one from you for awhile and thought “I better go make sure Kae is ok!” Stupid feedly!
I was the 4th child so I for sure did not get breakfast made for me! Ha! My mom would occasionally make oatmeal or malt-o-meal in the winter but otherwise it was mostly cereal or yogurt. I know making eggs is easy but I wouldn’t have it in me to make eggs on a week day morning. That is a weekend meal for us! But I think you should decide what to do based on what is most important to you in the morning. Independence? Quality time? Getting out the door on time? Nutritious first meal of the day? It’s hard to envision what our mornings will look like as that is so far off! Right now mornings are not my favorite because Paul often refuses to let Phil do anything for him (he told him to go away this morning when Phil attempted to get him out of his crib/get him dressed!). And then he can have meltdowns at time, too. So I am just looking forward to a time when mornings aren’t so difficult. But we have to be out the door by 7 on mornings that Phil drives them to school on his way to work. So there isn’t a ton of wiggle room!
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